


i want you to stay

by aloofaquarius



Category: Legacies (TV 2018)
Genre: Angst, Cute, F/F, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, Slow Build, Slow Burn, Vampires, Werewolves, Witches, tribrid
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-15
Updated: 2020-04-19
Packaged: 2021-03-02 03:35:18
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 12,758
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23588506
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aloofaquarius/pseuds/aloofaquarius
Summary: Hosie story dont know where its going yet but recently watched season 2 then rewatched season one leading me to watch season 5 of originals but thats besides the point. I wanted to depict the reality of Hosie because I see the writers giving them this slow born leading up to their relationship
Relationships: Hosie - Relationship, Mizzie - Relationship
Kudos: 41





	1. Chapter 1

_"Hope?" Freya softly speaks getting her attention. After her mom, uncle and father died she hasn't stopped moving. Frankly she doesn't want to._

_"Hope?" Freya retorts grabbing her mourning niece's forearm getting her to finally stand still_

_"Aunt Freya---Please..." Hope begs not wanting to look at her, constantly moving meant that she doesn't have to wallow and accept the truth. And right now she's cleaning her room getting ready to move back to Mystic Falls._

_"Honey--hey. I just want you to stand still for a second." Freya convinces Hope to finally stop and look at her. Freya notices her puffy red eyes, its been 3 weeks since her fathers death and a whole 2 months since her mothers but time might not be on her side when it comes to healing those wounds_

_"I can't--I can't stop--I have to keep moving because if I stop for even a second I'll--start thinking about---" Hope stutters, Freya simply nods her head and pulls her niece a little into a warm long hug. Knowing that out of everything in this world this is probably the one thing she craves and needs._

Super squad as MG likes to call them had an important mission today, it involved plagues, mummies, stones and urns. Very Indiana Jones, but the whole day Lizzie couldn't help herself but torment Hope about something that she's never done. There is one thing that Hope has learned from being what she is, that simply everyone is asking for something and they've already got an idea in their head of who she is. She is the daughter of a hybrid alpha, a psychotic hybrid and suicidal witch. Nothing is impossible but Hope's come to learn that others opinions about her is just as impossible to change as her existence in this world. 

All day Lizzie has hinted and has passive-aggressively mentioned her jealousy about Hope and their fathers close relationship, but what can Hope say. Because at the end of the day, Hope needs Alaric as much as he needs her because as mentor and mentee their relationship may be the last thing Hope wants to do is replace her father. But by the end of the trip the Lizzie and Hope came to the conclusion that they've been ignoring Lizzie's other half, which in some cases Josie likes. This being one of them until the two can finally see eye to eye.

As soon as they got back to school Josie runs, but Alaric advised both girls to give her some time to breathe. Not to dismiss or excuse her behavior to drive the two girls away from one another but to let the brunette collect her thoughts. 

"Why would you drive a wedge between me and Hope? Why lie?" Hope hears Lizzie ask from the twins room, she finally had a moment to think and confront Josie

"I was gonna ask the same thing." The two girls turn around the Hope's voice chiming into the conversation. Josie becomes nervous not knowing what to say, she looks back at Lizzie and sighs.

"I didn't just lie--" Josie starts "I started the fire. Lizzie had made some remark about me being obsessed with you. I just blurt out, _How could I be obsessed with somebody who would say such mean things about my_ _twin?_ "

"But I didn't." Hope interrupts still not making sense of it all 

"I know I just made it up." Josie acknowledges 

"Why?" 

"Because I didn't want Lizzie to know the truth." Josie blurts, " I have a crush on you, and I had slipped a note into your room that morning and---I don't know I just really immediately regretted it but I couldn't get in by then. So I did a fire spell under your door--" Josie pause knowing the intensity of that fire so much of Hope's things went up into flames 

"I was really only aiming for the note," Josie confesses and everyone is taken a back but mostly Hope because this whole crush flows both ways. 

"Why would it matter that I knew?" Lizzie speaks up and Josie turns around "Because my whole life, any time I've ever liked anyone, you go for them and you always win." Josie confesses yet again and this time Lizzie is finally coming to contact with her actions because it's true. Almost every single person she liked she never actually had feelings for. If anything she only ever competed with Josie because she knows deep down they'll pick Josie over her and she just couldn't have that.

Hope chuckles feeling a little flushed at all the information she is receiving right now, "You have a crush on me?"

"Of course. Who wouldn't." Josie smiles blushing a bit realizing that Hope has caught on. Hope is getting ready to say more but Alaric comes walking towards the twins room. 

"Hope, girls." He smiles liking how the three are potentially finally getting use to being involved with one another. 

"I'll see you guys later" Hope smiles and starts walking towards her room. 

\----

The next morning, Hope woke up with a skip to her step. Nothing too noticeable but her shoulders didn't feel as heavy as they usually did at the thought of waking up. Seeing that this is the only the 3rd day of spring break break Hope could really use just a good old boring day of reading, painting maybe even swimming. With that in mind Hope gets ready for a day in the sun by the lake. 

"Hope-hey." Landon scrambles catching up to her. _Shit._ She'd forgotten about her and Landon. She's been so caught up on the twin express that she'd asked Landon to be her boyfriend a week ago and yet she hasn't gotten use to the idea. Last time she had a crush let alone felt something like this was Josie and she cant count the murderess idiot that got her mother killed. 

"Oh-hi-rig-what's up?" Hope scrambles collecting her thoughts, he smiles coming in for a kiss but Hope turns and receives the kiss through her cheek

"How are you? Is everything okay? You never stopped by my room after your field trip yesterday." This only reminded Hope of the conversation she had with Josie and twins last night, it also reminded her that she never got to fully answer Josie or react at all. 

"Oh right uhm-it was long you know it honestly slipped my mind. We got home pretty late and had basically spent about 24 hours together I just wanted a good night sleep." Hope sheepishly smile allowing him to nod

"Oh yeah of course, well did you want to do something today?" He wonders playing with her hands, 

"Uh-maybe in a few hours I was hoping to get a few things done. Talk to my Aunt Freya, my Uncle Kol and my Aunt Rebekah about a few things ." Hope smiles hoping that Landon will buy it. Instead of having a relaxing time she's going to have to think and process her feelings. Hope knows damn well that this is not her strong suit. 

"Oh yeah sure well I'll be with Raf and MG." He comes in for a kiss one more time but this time he aims for her cheeks which she is thankful for. The two awkwardly, say goodbye before heading in different directions. 

Maybe her lies aren't such a bad idea, I mean who is she suppose to talk about her relationship problems. Hope strolls to the docks and sets up, before projecting herself to her aunt. When she appears onto her Aunt's office she's happy to see her actually working, no witches or anything supernatural. 

_'Hope, hi is everything okay?'_

_'Yeah I just--I need some advice Aunt Freya and between you, Rebekah and Kol I find that you've got the best experience.'_

_'You got me there. What's going on sweetie.'_

_'Well you remember that boy I told you about--'_

_'Landon yes what about him? Did he do something? Are we going to have too--'_

_'Nooo-noo--Aunt Freya relax, we're okay I think I just-'_ Hope chuckles

_'Oh okay, just making sure.'_

_'Right so, uhm, do you remember we had a talk last year about you know--family drama once again ensued '_

_'Gender and sexuality? Yes of course I do, does this mean this talk is about Josie?'_ Freya looks at her blushing niece, knowing how big this crush was for 14 year old Hope but with everything that happened last year her feelings this year could've changed which is 100 percent understandable. 

_'Yes, and it just confused my feelings for Landon.'_

_'Okay well what's wrong sweetie?'_

_'Yesterday there was a talk that went on between me and the twins. There was some tension between Lizzie I, she kept accusing me of doing something to grab their fathers attention away from them and ruin their family spring break. But I knew I never did what she was accusing me of doing--'_

_'Yeah no that doesn't sound like you, you've got the same taste of revenge as your father which isn't a bad thing.'_

_'Thanks Aunt Freya, either way the conversation led to Josie confessing that she has a crush on me.'_

_'Oooh she has a crush on you?'_ Freya coo's and Hope continues to blush 

_'Freya please, it confused the hell out of me. To the point where I didn't even meet up with Landon when I was suppose to and it completely slipped my mind that he is my boyfriend and Josie is..'_

_'You're first girl crush that you couldn't exactly focus on with the shit show that happened last year, but with her confession it brought everything back?'_

_'Jesus way to nail it. But yes that is true...I mean thinking about it isn't helping because I spent so much time just wracking my brain trying to get her to notice me.'_

_'Oh sweetie, I know you were in puppy love. But honestly the only person you can talk to and could get closure from would be--'_

_'Josie!'_ Hope interrupts seeing Josie walking out of the corner bushes getting her to toss the gem into the lake in panic loosing Freya.

"Hey, I knew I'd find you here I wanted to talk about last night." Josie walks up to the edge of the docks and sits right next to Hope

"Oh yeah, what's up?" Hope stops dangling her feet and turns to Josie leaning her back against the post. 

"About what I said--" Josie starts to explains but Hope's attention gets distracted with Freya's astral projection at the other side of the dock. Freya is about to open her mouth but see's Josie and starts smiling and mouthing.

 ***That's so cute she found you!*** Hope enlarges her eyes trying so signal to Freya to shut up. 

"Hope? Are you--Who are you looking at?" Josie turns her head but Freya disappears 

"Nothing what were you saying?"

" I was saying that I hope what I said last night didn't weird you out, or make you feel out of place when it comes to our friendship because I--"

"I like you too," Hope blurts unknowingly shocking, Josie can't help but smile at Hopes confession

"Because wait what?--"

"Does it freak you out? I mean I know thats a bit hypocritical to assume but I dont know. All I know is this, I was fourteen when I had a crush on you and I guess a part of me will never let that go of that what if. My dad use to say-"

"There you are. Hi Hope, Josie, dad has planned a day with us doing stuff with him in town. C'mon lets go." Lizzie smiles a little softer than usual which means things between all three of them are getting better 

"Oh-uhm can we talk about this later?" Josie turns to Lizzie then back to Hope

"Yeah stop by my room when you come back." Hope smiles, Josie sympathetically smiles before walking away to go to Lizzie

"Why is your heart racing jeez." Lizzie complains 

"What do you mean?" Josie awkwardly chuckles 

"Well I'm not nervous nor did I run here so--dont forget whatever you feel I feel too." Lizzie says, but Josie doubts that Lizzies feels how she feels right now


	2. Chapter 2

_6 Hours Later..._

After her talk with Josie, Hope decided to work with the silence that nature granted her. It always reminded her off of her father, because in the quiet is when she felt her father was at peace. She wrote a lot and painted even more, time slipped away and she only ever noticed that time has slipped her when she noticed that the sun was setting. Instead of packing her things she decided to sit and watch the sunset.

"You're still here." Josie says, Hope turns around and smiles 

"You caught me but in fairness I never left" Hope confesses

"Oh really? How come?" Josie wonders 

"Nature and the quiet reminds me of my dad." Hope confesses sitting down on the edge of the docks 

"Do you miss him?" Josie decides to sit next to Hope 

"I don't think I'll ever stop missing them. As crazy as my family is they almost always reacted in a way to protect us and I guess I was one of the few people that saw the good in them. Now, I'm just trying to enlighten people you know."

"What do you mean?" Josie is aware of the Mikaelson's reputation being one of the original families means people tremble at the sound of your name. 

"Everyone--even your dad fears that I'll be like my family. Frankly before anyone could get to know me they've already considered me as the villain." Hope sighs knowing how protected she's gotten since everyone finally knew who she was. She first came to the school when she was 8 but it only took a year for everyone to know who she was. Which meant unintended fear.

"But you aren't a villain Hope, I know that, so does Lizzie, MG, Kaleb, Landon, Rafael and despite what my father said he just doesn't want you to forget the bad about the world Hope. You were surrounded with so much negativity that your family forgot about their own good." Josie rationalizes and Hope smiles at the kind thought that Josie just offered her 

"I--Thank you Jo, how was your day with your dad? Did Lizzie finally get her day with him, no interruptions?" Hope chuckles and once again Josie is quick to defend both Hope and her sister

"Hey no---Hope its not like that, its just we don't get to see our mom but we get to see him all the time and for him to be there but feel like he isn't even there at all. It hurts a bit we're a bit sensitive. If people dont wanna be your frien-"

"Dont worry, years here I've learned how to deal with the murmurs and whispers about me." Hope shrugs enduring all the teasing and name calling 

"I'm sorry, Hope. I know we haven't been the best of friends and honestly we should've been there for you when your parents past away--"

"Hey no, dont worry I prefer to grieve alone. I tend to have my parents temper and I tend to turn to my anger when I'm grieving." Hope smiles fumbling around with her fingers 

"No one should ever grieve alone, I mean you were there when I--Lizzie and I had to let go of our mother." Josie sighs resting her head on Hopes shoulder remember how it broke Hope seeing Alaric and the twins like that. Hope wrote the book on knowing what it's like to lose somebody important in your life. In all honesty no one should have to endure that much pain. 

“Did you mean what you said earlier?” Josie brings up. Hope tenses up a bit forgetting about the whole confession but remembering how much she meant it. 

“I did, back when we were 14 I had a huge crush on you. I never acted on it because you had Penelope or you guys were fooling around I just remember coming back from New Orleans and you guys were dating. But I remember frantically calling Freya, letting her know about how I was acting. A part of me wanted to spend every second with you and then there was the other part that would throw up when you were around.” Josie chuckles knowing exactly how that feels. Josie has always had a soft spot for Hope. Having spent so much with her starting when they were younger she always looked up to Hope, until it became a crush. 

“So what n—“Josie’s interrupted by her fathers frantically running to the girls. The two turnaround and Josie speaks up “Dad? Is everything—“

”Hope I need your help. Raf’s been rushed to the medics office. 

“Wait Raf? Is Landon okay? Where’s MG?” Hope is quick to react and stands up. Josie fixes herself and follows Hope’s actions. 

“That’s the thing, they weren’t with Raf. C’mon we need to go. He’s teetering.” Hope gets up and ponders, what the hell does teetering mean. Teetering from what, but before she walks any further she looks back at a disappointed Josie. "I'm so sorry." Hope mouths offering Josie a sympathetic smile, Josie simply responds with a nod. 

Alaric and Hope speed walk back inside the school and to the medics office. When they get to Raf, Hope finds him cowering at his own shadow with blood around his mouth and neck. 

"MG...Landon..." He mumbles to himself, Hope runs to his side "Hey, what's going on? Where's Landon?" 

Raf looks at her "I can't remember." scaring Hope a bit more as if her feelings for Josie isn't scaring her enough. She turns to Alaric hoping he can take over a bit while she panics over her lost and possibly dead boyfriend. Raf starts to heavily breathe, as Emma goes on about lunar psychosis. 

"Luna psychosis? That's a thing?" Alaric repeats, but it only irritates Rafael some more, "Quit talking. Making noise." Raf starts to heave and balling his fists before jumping up growling scaring the shit out of everyone even Hope. Emma puts her hand out "Tardus pulsatio" and chants. Rafael stands down. 

"It's a thing." Emma defends herself, "What did you do to him?" Hope wonders 

"It's okay. I'm just slowing down his heart. It will calm him" Emma defends, Raf is confused and conflicted "What's happening to me? I keep...losing time" he calmly says 

"As I said...lunar psychosis, which means that your mind is in flux, trapped between...your wolf and human states, making it harder bridge the gap and access your memories like you normally would. It's very rare. It only happens after a premature reversion," Emma explains 

"So something caused your body to shift back before the full moon was over, leaving you like this." Hope concludes and Raf is perplexed "Wh-What kind of something?" Raf speaks up 

"Usually trauma. Something bad happened." Hope speaks making her feel uneasy. 

This has only happened to Hope once. It was the first time she'd turn everything is going great she'd listened to what her father has said. She had roamed around but had heard desperate screams coming from near by. A few men had crowded and targeted this mother and daughter stranded in the middle of the New Orleans bayou. There are screams, groans and moans that Hope can still hear every time she closes her eyes. Other than that Hope can't remember what took over her, but she went after those men and by the time it was over she'd turn back to her human state cold, naked and covered in blood with her uncle Kol carrying her back to the compound. It broke her there was no torn clothes, she was just covered in scratches and blood. 


	3. Chapter 3

Hope went through a lot getting but also losing Landon all at the same day. I mean what do you say to your phoenix boyfriend, to your ripper friend and to your best friends teetering alpha mindset. Frankly, Hope is left with not much to say. It felt like a rollercoaster of emotions, a ride that she only ever experiences with her family. A ride she wishes she she'd never got on. After everything that happened yesterday the only thing she wanted to do was sleep, not process or dwell but sleep. It was a lot. 

When Hope was younger and finally honed it and embraced her witch side she started to suffer from night terrors. They had been dormant but after everything with her parents they came back and never left. Now for Landon she can't speak for him, she's aware of Rafaels checkered abusive past but not Landons and right now he's about to experience Hope's night terrors. 

Landon is snuggled up to his traumatized girlfriend tightly gripping him. He starts to feel Hope's pulse rise as she starts to exhibit signs of night terrors. She starts whimpering holding a little tighter on Landon. Landon sits up to get a better look at her but nothings changed. She's still here sleeping with her eyes closed only this time she's tighten her grip on the pillow. Whimpering a little louder as she starts another episode of a night terror. Landon places his hand on her shoulder trying to gently get her back to reality but she continues to whimper on the verge of screaming, "Hope, wake up."

"Hope, wake up" he repeats again this time a little more aggressive than the last which doesn't serve him well. Hope starts her screaming match which is accompanied by a wave of magic causing Landon to ultimately land on Hope's paint desk. 

No ones been around before during her night terrors so this is simply new territory. Unbeknownst to her this caused a bit of panic, but in all honesty she's just a bit tense with whats been going on with her. The couple decide to go about their day as normal as possible classes and all. Yet by the time Hope gets to training normal and privacy is the last thing Hope got. The sticks come into contact with one another but Dr. Saltzman has been rather silent this whole training session which is rare. He is only ever this quiet when he's got something on his mind, and that he does. 

He subtly tries to bring up what Landon is worried about. Hope is quick to deny it but her magical defenses begged to differ due to its quick reflexes when she's emotionally pushed. Alaric flies across the room and Hope is hit with guilt, "Okay. I-I could stand to blow off some steam. I'm gonna...go check the woods to see if I can wolf out."

Hope walks out of the gym and starts to jog towards the woods. Seeing that jogging and huffing tends to activate her wolf side she starts to run turning her

\----

One hour later...

Usually her runs and wolf outbreaks last longer than an hour but with all the humans on campus it's a bit of threat. She came back from her run and changed back into uniform but she still can feel herself tense up every now and again. And having to see him, Roman, isn't exactly bettering the situation. It took a lot for Hope to forgive Roman, and just like her he is trying to make a difference. Letting people know that they are not who their parents were. 

Landon notices Hope's change in disposition and follows her eye-line, to find a blonde curly headed boy smiling at his girlfriend. He turns to Hope " Who is that?" 

Hope is frozen, she' still processing it a bit. "Um...That is Roman...My ex-boyfriend." 

"Oh." Landon responds but the couple are quiet. Roman walks up and Hope steps in front of Landon, he starts going about his business here and Hope is still hesitant Roman nods to Landon.

"Oh, uh, this is Landon."

"Her boyfriend and a phoenix by the way, which is...so cool " Roman feels awkward and decides to excuse himself. Hope turns to her threatened boyfriend "That was a little alpha male of you."

"I mean, is that the 90-year-old vampire ex you may have mentioned murdered your mom?"

"It is. Though I dont hold him responsible for what happened anymore." Hope tries to nonverbally communicate to leave it alone. Landon excuses himself and Hope is left there with even more tension that she'd like to hold on to. Meaning onto the next task, but she wasnt ready for what Lizzie is about to give her. Hoping the taller blonde could distract her even more than her own boyfriend she heads for the dictating twin.

But Lizzie's rise to victory is put to a halt when her victory is threatened leaving her to give the running title to Hope. When Hope asked for a distraction this is not what she meant. With a lot of convincing Hope finds herself in the ballroom with Landon getting ready for this dance. 

"I just can't believe you were so nice to him. After everything you told me he did to you and your family, you can act like nothing happened?" He starts 

"It's complicated, he spent half of his live desiccated in a cave and the he was brainwashed by his mother who was a literal Nazi. And he's spent the last two years doing really good work for the school." Hope explains not wanting to get into a row with her boyfriend during what suppose to be a supple and sweet arrangement 

"Your mother is still dead. How does any of that exonerate him?" As she if she needed to be reminded. 

"It doesn't. But it's in the past. Leave it." Hope's reaction to emotional distress is starting come out and Lizzie is the first one to notice everything in sight is shaking. 

"I suffered through how much torture because I stole a knife, and this guy has a hand in death of your-"

"Landon." she pulls herself away knowing of her genes are hard to maintain and today seems to be the day where its constantly being tested 

"Stop." Hope starts to control her breathing and balling her fist. Lizzie walks up to Hope caressing her forearm. 

"Come with me." Lizzie says through her teeth glaring at Landon as much as Hope is. "You, stay here. Do nothing."

Lizzie summons their coats waiting by the side exits of the school, when the coats arrive she says"Put it on and lets go." Lizzie grabs her coat and starts walking outside. Hope is hesitant to say the least but decides to trust the blonde seeing what they've both been through recently. Hope follows Lizzie. 

A couple of minutes of walking in pure silence. "Lizzie, where are we going?" 

"You are a ticking time bomb. I'm gonna show you how to take care of it before you hurt someone, or worse, cost us the pageant." Lizzie explains knowing that maybe she should've heeded Hopes warning earlier 

"I'm fine. Okay? I just needed some air.."

"You are far from fine. You are one small moment away from a meltdown, trust me. And I remember what happened a few days ago with you and Josie but seeing that your boyfriend yes that's right, I know that little gremlin is your boyfriend officially, died then came back to life. Not everything is exactly easy now is it? I know the signs. You know that feeling inside, like a balloon constantly filling up, always on the verge of popping? " Lizzie interrupts 

"Maybe." Hope caves 

"Well, let it pop. Scream as loud as you can." Hope hesitates once again knowing that last time she did this it ended multiple lives of vampire Nazi's. And left her own father down to his knees. Is she really going to let somebody else see one of her most powerful forms. She decides to take her advice takes a deep breath in and lets it all out. Waves of magic come from her mouth and her hands reverberating into the forest. The trees shake, parts of the ground lift up along with dirt and leaves. Lizzie is left in shock. 

Hope starts to feel herself faint just like the last time only this time she actually does faint everything turns black and Hope falls back. Lizzie runs to catch Hope just in time as the panic starts to set in. She repositions herself so she is able to grab her phone and call for he dad. 

_*Daddy!*_ Lizzie shouts on the phone in panic, she hears her dad excuse himself

_*Lizzie baby, what's going on? What's wrong?*_

_*It's Hope, she'd been tense all day and I took her to the back acres to let out some frustration--you know like how I do--you know...and she did it--and--it was amazing but then she fainted. I dont know what to do daddy*_

_*Ok-okayy--okay sweetie dont move. Kaleb and I we'll be there in 5 minutes okay.*_

_*Daddy please hurry I dont know what to do.*_

_*Just keep her head elevated and make sure she's still breathing okay. Just calm down okay. She's okay.*_ Last time she fainted she saw her mother. 

_*Okay, daddy please hurry*_ Lizzie puts her phone down and starts to observe Hope while saying her name. "Hope, wake up---please---please wake up c'mon Hope." Lizzie starts to cry, the thing last she wanted to do was get her to faint or anything like that. She was just trying to help. After five minutes her dad, Kaleb, Josie and MG come running. 

"Hey it's okay" Josie rushes towards Lizzie and lays Lizzie's head on her shoulder as the boys grab Hope's body. 

"Josie, take your sister up to your rooms okay." Josie looks up at her father and nods. She has a lot of questions right now and to be quite honest with you she's on the verge of tears, she hated seeing Hope so dead. Josie starts to stroke Lizzie's hair trying to calm her down. 

"Do you wanna tell me what happened?" Josie helps her sister sit and stand up. 

"Honest, I didn't want her to hurt herself. I was just trying to help." Lizzie stutters as they start walking back to the school 

"I know, I think this calls for Twin Cuddles. Just take a breather okay, then we'll figure out what we're going to do." Josie continues to keep the rock in her throat, she doesn't want to breakdown just quite yet. Josie opens their bedroom and lays her sister down caressing her hair until she knows she's asleep. 

Josie walks out and slides down burying her head in her hands sobbing. She should've been there, she's been so caught in Penelope and pageant drama that she didn't even see what was going on. She's spent the longest time being so afraid with her relationship with Hope when she could've been getting to know the Tribrid. Sure obsessing over the tribrid gave a little bit of that, her fix but so much of her time has been so wasted. And now god knows what now.

"Josie, hey" Alaric levels with her daughter before standing her up and pulling her into a hug

"Listen, I've got to take care of the pageant right now, so why don't you go stay with Hope. I'm sure she'd appreciate it."

"Yeah sure, do you have any idea what happened?" The two start walking towards medical office 

"It might've been her own powers but we won't know for sure,"

"Is that possible?"

"With Hope? Yes. Anything is possible. Last time she did this her dad was brought to his knees, the other time it happened it left a lot of Nazi vampires dead. But you never either, she is the only one of her kind Jo, theres no book I can read. Her magic runs through everybody, she inherited magic from one of the oldest witches. We don't know what she is capable of, she's got a lot of power it could've been too much." Alaric simply explains, the duo get to Hopes bed. Josie finds the fair skinned girl softly breathing as she is resting. Josie sits beside Hope patiently stirring and hoping she'll wake up soon. 

Josie watches as Hope's chest softly rises and falls, parts of Josie has always wondered why keeps she kept her distance. For most of this year, their sophomore year she's been nothing but helpful. Have they been unconventional and almost foreign, yes but they always got the job down. She's done so much to protect this place and Josie can finally see that, she brought people a home when they didn't have any. Yet she refuses to see the good in her, prefers to live in the shadow without others knowing her deeds. It's the one thing that Josie always admired about Hope. The one thing that always made Josie gravitated towards Hope both consciously and unconsciously. Anytime she had Hope around she felt indestructible as if she is capable of doing anything.

It saddens Josie to see how she often lets others opinions of her dictate her behavior in this school. Josie knows that she has some part into that but she knows that we are made up of the worst and best part of our parents. The auburn haired, blue eyed girl has got so many demons that Josie can't even bare to think about it. To have to get up every morning with all that pain and find the strength and the good to fight for people until her last breath. 

"Josie?" Hope croaks pulling Josie out of her head and turning to the blue eyed girl next to her. Josie sympathetically smiles, reaching for the girls hands to comfort her. 

"Hey, how are you feeling?" 

"Like my head is made out of cement. What happened?" Hope sits up rubbing her temples 

"We dont really know, whats the last thing you remember?"

"Uh--its a bit blurry but Lizzie took me to the back acres to let out some steam--and then not much"

"You fainted Hope, do you remember feeling something--"

"I just remember my hands were shaking like a lot of power was just coursing through my veins and for a second I got it handled then black."

"Well, I guess for now that's all we can conclude. I'm glad you're okay though--" 

"How long was I out?" 

"An hour I'm gonna go get the nurse." Josie stands up but Hope pulls her back "Thank you for staying with me." Josie smiles before walking out to grab the nurse. 

Hope sits up and puts her shoes on, when she looks up she sees the nurse that is a carbon copy of Madame Pomfrey.

"Good, glad to see your up again. How are you feeling?" she smiles with her thick Scottish accent

"Other than the splitting headache, I'm okay."

"Okay, a lot of power coursing through your veins Hope, being a werewolf balances that power but if you use too much the human in you tends to suffer." She explains and Hope nods

"Understood" 

"Right you may leave. Watch her will you dear?" She points to Josie making her chuckle while Hope rolls her eyes. 

"She will." Hope grabs Josie's hands and they walk out of the office. 


	4. Chapter 4

Josie takes Hope back to her room to relax a bit before feeding her to the monster that is her sister.

"Alright I'll see you later." Josie tries to walk out but once again Hope pulls her back

"Stay, please. We can paint for a bit if you want."

"I can't paint-"

"So, my dad use to say you dont have to know how to do something when you're creating art."

"Your dad was also extremely talented and intelligent"

"Don't forget murderous, please" Hope bites her bottom lip hoping that Josie stays. Josie runs her tongue on the top lip before caving and walking back to Hope. Hope smiles and shuts the door. 

\---

After a couple of hours Hope heads for the twins room to let Lizzie know she’s feeling better. Due to the lost time she’s letting Lizzie know that she’ll try her best to win this for the twins.

Lizzie couldn't have been happier, for Lizzie it seemed that Jo's effort to damage of her own chances is far from redeemable. Lizzie got to work prepping Hope while Josie did the best she could by herself. Knowing the anger that is building up in her, she decided that it'd be best that she gets ready elsewhere without having to watch her crush and her sister bond in a way that she'd hope she would've bonded with her own twin.

Josie is grateful that Hope is safe and all but a part of her wishes she knew what was going on between them. She asked Josie to stay which confused Josie even more, I mean where was Landon during this whole thing. He's her boyfriend right, thats what boyfriends do they are there suppose to be there. Instead of asking for him, Hope didn't. Josie fears that questioning Hope seems likes asking a lot from the auburn haired girl. Especially with whats going on with the school and her life lately. 

As for her sister, thats simply a can of worms she often debates whether its worth opening at all. Once she is ready she lines up with the rest of the contestants, searching for her escort, MG. Yet he hasnt shown up. Though he did mention his mother coming by and trying to stir up some trouble. 

Josie looks back at Hope and see's that familiar dress their mom had given them. She smiles at her crush, she seems a tad distracted seeing that she is also missing an escort. But she soon makes eye contact with Josie and smiles back giving them both some ease. Then satan herself came up next to her. 

"You are like a lingering cough." 

"MG's M.I.A, you're stuck with me." Penelope puts her arm out and Josie is left with no choice. Hope watches the interaction go down but couldn't feel disappointed. It hurt her seeing Josie and Penelope like that. It felt like a painful flashback of her invisibly pining over the younger girl.

"Riddle me this," Penelope starts "How does you losing everything help Hope win?"

"I'm the fall girl. I had to make it into contention to this point, the final event, so I could take a literal fall and take out Hope's closest competitor" As Josie says it out loud the dumber it sounds, she loves her sister more than anything but this is pushing it too far 

"For real? Josie, you are so much better than that.I know Lizzie doesn't think you can win, but I do." If this whole thing would've happened before their empending break up. A part of Josie would've probably taken it to heart and consideration but since nothing good came from their break up how is she to trust Penelope at all. "Go down swinging. You deserve to walk down those steps with you head held high, like your mom did" she adds 

For a second there, just for one second Penelope almost had her, but this is bigger than her now. Especially after seeing Hope in that dress. Josie reminds herself that she wouldn't be who she is if she didn't put others before herself. Hope isn't able to see the literal downfall of Josie because by then she is too busy scanning the room for Landon, moments before she is announced he walks up next to her. 

"Hey, where have you been?" But no response from her boyfriend, he seems extremely distracted maybe word got around about her conversation with the twins more importantly Josie. "You okay? Why do you smell like a bar?" Hope probes knowing that bringing up trouble probably isn't the perfect time. 

"Penelope Park told me that you are keeping a secret..." He pauses giving Hope tiny heart attacks "...About my mom" 

_Shit._

"She says that we met her and that I dont remember it...but you do" He continues. "She's lying, right? Just tell me she's lying, Hope." He commands and Hope stays quiet a part of her wanted to be angry at Penelope and at him. 

"You know, I wasn't always the most honest person, but...you were the one that taught me the value in being truthful. And the truth is...I cant be here right now." Hope is speechless because these last few weeks she's done nothing but lie. Lie to herself, to her friends, to Alaric and frankly she hates that she's found comfort in that. She pulls on him as he walks away "Landon, Landon" but he doesn't stop

Panic starts to set in, her pulse starts to rise she gets ready to walk out but Roman pulls up next to her "Just five more minutes. Get through this and it'll all be over." she doesn't mind Roman coming into the rescue. But if Hope could be honest she wishes to be with Josie, the brunette always had a calming effect on everyone. It might be the years of Lizzie explosions or simply she is just so good either way Hope craves her right now.

Having been disqualified Josie finally took it upon herself to go and read Penelope's note. As she is walking to her room she sees a panicked Landon walking the opposite of the pageant. She tries to get his attention "Landon, hey!" but nothing he seems to be wrapped up in his own mind. 

Landon makes it outside for some fresh-air, he hears faint footsteps following him only to reveal its a carbon copy of medusa. Threats comes to the scene which isn't foreign to him by now but if he's being honest this is the last thing he'd rather be dealing with right now. Thankfully MG came to rescue him. 

"So why aren't you with Hope, she's had a rough day?" MG questions

"Oh really?" Landon laughs thinking about how much shit he had to deal with regarding all these secrets people seem to have kept from him 

"Yeah, didn't you hear? Oh wait-I forgot, Hope fainted and spent an hour in the nurse's office. I figured somebody would've told you. I mean she is your girlfriend thats kind of sus if you ask me but--"

"MG. I can't talk about this right now. Thanks again." Landon unties his tie and starts walking back to his dorm to change. 

During this time Hope's finally gotten to the finale, the waltz. If anything she's glad that these last hours didn't feel like a millions years. Roman tries to make conversation but she prefers to keep it short, feeling like parts of her still doesn't want to forgive him. As the two dances, Hope see's a distraught Josie walk up to her rather proud sister. She couldn't tell what the girls were talking about but clearly it was important and attention grabbing. 

"What are they fighting about?" Hope wonders knowing that Romans isn't as distracted as her, truth be told he'd been listening to their conversation this whole time. But wanting to spare Hope even more emotional distress he decides to just minimize it. Yet Hope persists she prefers not to see her friends in distraught. Roman tunes back in to hear the two argue about the selfish and inconsiderate tendencies of Lizzie. Hope catches Josie's eyes but they weren't eyeing her they were eyeing the dress she's wearing. 

Roman having played such a big part in her heartache prefers not to contribute any longer. Hope watches as Lizzie's whole demeanors changed as Josie walks away. 

Roman utters the words "Your father gave it to her." and Hope felt her world start to crumble she'd spent all day focusing on her anger while ignoring her overwhelmed emotional distraught feelings that she if finally feeling it all at once. The ballroom starts to rumble and Lizzie can feel it too. Hope gets announced as the winner but she's too far gone into her emotional distraught. Tears filling up in her eyes, Lizzie comes running in for a hug. Something that she simply needed all day. 

"Congratulations. It's okay. Just let it out. The real way.The way you've needed to all along." Lizzie knows her fair share of mental breakdowns but she's completely forgotten that what almost always brought her back is Josie comforting her into a hug while she just cries. Hope nods wrapping her arms around Lizzie and letting her tears fall. 

The event ends, after a multiple congratulations she excuses herself to look for Landon and Josie. "I've got to go find Landon and Josie."

"Just give him minute to breathe, boys need some space before they come crawling back. As for Josie, tell her I'm sorry." She'd given the sash to Lizzie bargaining for her to give Josie the crown. Before she leaves though she decides to take a breather for a bit. 

"I thought I could keep it all together. I've worked so hard to move on from all the things that have happened to me in my life. But everyone was right. Everyones been right. I needed to, like, let it all out. How did you know what to say? How'd you know what to do?" 

"It's just what Josie's done for me a thousand times. I know she's really mad at me. I dont think I've ever seen her so angry." 

"Why dont we help each other out? I help you with Josie and you help me with Landon. Just know that by the end of all go this I might really need you." Hope gets up from Josie's bed and towards the door, she waits for Lizzies agreement before heading out.

She starts searching for the brunette when she hears the familiar voice of Penelope and Josie, she stops in her tracks eavesdropping by the corner. "You weren't gonna say goodbye?" She hears Josie says 

"I did, in my letter." Penelope responds "Which I'm guessing you finally read."

"Belgium?"

"My mom got a job. And there's a great witch-only school, so I dont have to deal with wolves or vamps or Lizzie."

"Penelope. Don't leave." With a statement like that Hope finds herself a little hurt, but it would be hypocritical of her to feel that way. She unintentionally ignored Josie for most of their friendship trying protect herself and more recently to bring some normalcy into her relationship with Landon which she's yet to figure out. 

"You know, for weeks, I have been hoping that you would give me one reason to stay. Instead, you gave me a thousand reasons to go. Losing on purpose, always putting yourself second. My heart can't take it. And I will not wait around and watch what happens to you next."

"What are you talking about?" 

"You know the pens I was using to spy? This...records all of it. It's basically a log of everything written down at the Salvator School. And I want you to read what your dad wrote about something called the Merge."

"I don't understand." 

"Well, you will. One day, you will understand why I did everything I did." There is a pause Hope sneaks her head around to see the two share a kiss, a desperate one at that. Hope knows that Penelope is Josie's first love and as far as first loves go they tend to stick around. "I love you, Jo-jo. I love you with all of my obnoxious, selfish evil heart." Is the last thing that Hope hears before the familiar sound of luggage is nearing by. She hides behind the corner unsure of what to do for herself or Landon or Josie. As if everything wasn't so complicated already. Hope starts to gently bang her head up against the wall trying to think up an idea. Instead she is disrupted by Josie. The best Hope can do for herself as well as them is to figure her feelings out. The true problem with that is when is she finally going to be able to do that.

"Hope?"

"Josie-I-uhmm-listen I wanted to give you this, you deserve this far more than I do, you looked amazing up there. I wish I would've told you sooner but--uhm--yeah I'm gonna go. I've had a long day." Hope hands her the crown, offers a sympathetic smile and walks to her room 

Josie is speechless. Parts of Josie ache with Penelope's sudden confession, while the other ache for the auburn haired girl who clearly heard their conversation. Other parts wanted to ask Hope what did she exactly hear and what happened to Landon why wasn't he there. But it seems that those questions might have to be answered another day. 


	5. Chapter 5

Next Morning...

Hope woke up completely blocked off from herself. No emotions, no thoughts no nothing. Leading her to sit in front of an empty canvas hoping for something to come out. Yet nothing comes to her, she's found solace and comfort that the best place for her confusing feelings is to be in her room. 

As for Josie, she decided to sleep somewhere she knew she'd get privacy. Penelope's room leaving Lizzie to sleep on her own. She also decided that its best to stay away from Hope and her sister for a bit by distracting herself with this merge research. After the emotional goodbye from Penelope its left a lot of unresolved feelings for the girl. It may be because they often hooked up after the break up. Which led both girls to complicating their feelings for one another. And one things for sure it doesn't help with her feelings with Hope, especially since they can barely get two words into the discussion before some monster or emergency comes popping up. 

One comforting thing did come out of this though, Hope is telling the truth she did like Josie back when she was 14 and the twins were 13 and of course recently. Josie had tried to talk herself out of reading what the blue eyed girl has written but with an eye grabbing titles "Josie is everywhere and Freya is no help" "What the fuck is going on with me?" how could she refuse she is human after all. 

_Journal #4_

**_Josie is everywhere and Freya is no help_ **

_I still refuse to call this a diary, but according to Emma this might help teach me control and focus. But I dont think there is much that this journal can do with my Josie problem. Ugh that sounds horrible to say, I dont have a problem with Josie, if anything its quite the opposite. I think I might have a crush on her. I mean what am I suppose to do. I started to notice this weird obsession I had with her. I could be doing the most randomest thing and there she was flying around in my head. Like there was this one day during Latin Incantation we were doing a simple spell and she made a joke that I couldn't help but laugh. It was the dorkiest thing I've ever heard in my life and yet I laughed and found it to be really cute. It started happening more frequently. Anything and almost everything reminds me of her, I mean what am I suppose to do? I've been taught a lot about how to control my supernatural side leaving my human side completely blindsided at mundane things like this. I decided to call Freya, kept it light at first. Getting her to leave the compound to be sure that my mom doesn't hear the conversation. I didn't even have to bring it up, if anything she's the one that brought it up. I guess the whole time we were talking I never stopped talking about Josie. Leading to me telling her how I'd feel anytime Josie is around _(like throwing up by the way, but in a I'm nervous I dont know what to do with myself type of way)_. All Freya did was coo and offer me a spells that could get me to be confident, or tell the truth or a one to get Josie to confess how she really really feels. I also explained how i wish I'd spend more time with her but if the opportunity presents itself I tend to put out quite the opposite. Instead, I make myself look aloof and an asshole. I asked if it was weird how I was feeling or if my parents would be mad even though one of them is HOMICIDALLY M.I.A. It's just I'm already one of my kind and I dont want to stand out let alone feel any lonelier than I already do. Ugh it kills me because I feel like my heart falls out of my body when Josie is around, I think it just freaks me out that I can't tell how I feel let alone how deep this runs. As hot and cold our friendship has been in the last decade they are the closest I've got to childhood friends. Look at me rambling on--HOLY FUCK--HOLY FUCK its Josie...._

_And I fucking did it again. She said hi and I just gave her a nod. What a fucking idiot. She clearly came into the library to study and instead of saying hi and inviting her to sit down. I gave her a fucking nod. A NOD. Where is that well known Mikaelson charm, because I swear if its skipped a generation my generation I will be so mad._

_Journal #186_

**_What the fuck is going on with me?_ **

_The last place I want to be right now is at school yet I know that being at home won't do me any good either. It took me a whole month to pack up my room and move to my family's house in mystic falls. Aunt Rebekah figures that I'd better off up here instead of being at the compound too much has happened in New Orleans. She emphasized that home is not a place but a feeling but lately I dont even know where I belong. Coming back at school just didn't give me that same feeling of home, instead I felt like a charity case. So many looks of despair followed by their tone, which only feeds into my anger. To add on top of that, I saw Josie and Penelope on the first day of school, this time she didn't even look at me at all. And I've got no one to blame but myself. I disappeared physically this time and all that sorry excuse of a progressed we'd made clearly meant much anything to her anymore. They look cute together and she seems happy. I wonder if she actually signed that card for my parents of did Alaric do it? All I know is that, who is going to take my anger away from me without my father? No one can endure, that much magic but he did. What's going to happen to me?_

Other than getting side track catching up with whats been going around this school, Jo continued with her early research. After an hour of waking up with the sun hoping creativity will strike Hope left her room with an empty canvas. Everyone seems to go back through their everyday routine, which included a quick trip to Alaric's office for god knows what now. 

Hope enters the room to see that Emma is there as well only their demeanor presented itself in a worried manner. Alaric shuts the door without saying a word and then plays the message Landon has left. 

***Hey, Ric. Sorry to take off like that, but I just needed a little time. So I'm going camping for a while. Hopefully I can catch up on classwork later. Tell Raf and Jed hi for me. ***

This is the last thing Hope needs, this year has been chaotic enough already and now she's has to yet again go on a search and rescue mission. She knows Landon isn't helpless but she's felt a sort of responsibility for the boy. She brought him here in the first place and convinced everyone for him to stay. "Jed? Why would he say hi to Jed?" Everything about the message just felt so out of character for Hope. 

Landon fears Jed, "You should go after him. Something doesn't make sense..." Hope is surprise to hear herself say.

"Hope.."

"Triad already tried to come for him once. It's not safe for him out there." 

"We kept a massive secret from him, and I think he just needs some time to process that. I think we should respect his privacy and just wait."

Hope scoffs at Alaric's hypocritical request. Respect his privacy, where was her privacy when she was convinced and force to move out of her family home in New Orleans instead of staying and mourning with her family. Where is her privacy when she's in need of emotional support and instead she's always got a mess to clean up. Hope leaves his office and heads to kitchens for a snack before heading to class. She walks in to a rather messy kitchen and a busy Lizzie. 

She'd completely forgotten the agreement of helping the blonde out. Hope tries to get back into it by continuing the conversation. 

"Status update: Josie didn't come back last night. I think she slept in Penelope's old room, which is a really good way to get hepatitis B." 

Hope looks up at the mention of Josie and then continued to shake her head to give the other twin her full attention. "Have you slept at all? You seem a little..."

"Focused? Motivated? On point?"

"Sure. Yeah."

"Not sleeping in the same bedroom means that Twin Forgiveness Cuddle is off the table. But she's been holed up in the library, so a snack offering should do the trick."

"At some point, you might actually have to apologize." God knows she owes her an apology. 

"Never apologize"

"Okay.."

"Trust me, okay? This is what we do. I'm selfish, then she sulks and then I offer baked goods."

"Someone else's baked goods."

"It's giving you something to do with yourself, isn't it? No Landon thinking or Josie thinking. In fact no feelings at at all simply, baking. Your turn for an update. Any word from our mod-headed elf?" So much for no Landon or Josie thinking 

"He says he needs time to think"

"Hmm."

"I dont know. I feel like if I could figure out the right thing to say, then he'd com back. But to get that I'd need to figure out what exactly is going on with me and my feelings for Josie and him and its just...a lot."

"So, practice. Emma has this prism that simulates a conversation she makes me use it to talk to my mom and my dad when I'm in a state. I'll trade you one prism for a banana cream pie." That might be the one thing she needs a good long talk no violence or hitting just talking. Rambling and not to a journal but to the possible people that she needs to talk to. She gets to baking as Lizzie excuses herself to go give Josie snacks. 

\---

After baking Hope made her way up to the twins bedroom with banana cream pie in hand as well as her journal and a book she stole for the twins. The two make a quick exchange with a few precautions seeing that this might be weird. 

Hope heads for the docks as soon as she got the chance. She contemplates for a second who she's going talk to, I mean who can she talk to. Without warning her mom pops up. Hayley clears her throat trying to get her daughters attention. 

"Jee-Mom?!" Hope jumps at the image of her dead mother just sitting there smiling at her 

"My sweet girl." Hayley smiles and Hope can't help but tear up a bit

"Mom." She remembers Lizzie's advice. They aren't real and they are a mere reflection of her subconscious which means there is no point in trying to hug her. Hope pulls back and decides to sit down next to her. 

"Wow this is crazy. Why my mom?"

"My guess, you wanted to hear the truth, and having your own mother say it for you might be the easiest way to hear it. How are you?"

"I'm okay, school is starting to get complicated. I'm used to being such a--"

"Loner? Like your father, constantly trying to push people away in the fears of hurting them?" Hayley smiles 

"I see why you popped up, but yes, this year changed I started dating this boy, named Landon but just like everything else in my life its complicated."

"Ooh a boy, how so?"

"Well for starters he's a phoenix which means he basically comes back to life anytime he dies. And he constantly finds himself in danger along with the school. I feel completely responsible for him and his actions because I'm the reason why he's still here. Everything almost got back to normal for us, until Josie."

"Josie? As in Josie Saltzman, Caroline and Alaric's daughter?" Hope nods forgetting to completely mention her intimate conversation with Freya about sexuality and gender 

"I'm sorry, I should've told you but I was too caught up on Dad and typical family drama. A part of me also feared that you'd judge me and wouldn't accept whatever or whoever it was I love. I went to Freya instead"

"Baby, I would never judge you. I judge your actions. I'm your mom. I love you, and I would forgive you for anything. I'll love you forever. I don't care who it is you love just as long as they make you happy. I cant say the same about your father but you can understand why. So Josie?" Hope is relieved to hear those words because it gives her the confidence to give her mother the full story. Possibly hoping that there are details she's missing that can clarify her feelings for Landon and Josie. 

"Right-uhm I recently found out that Josie had and possibly has a crush on me? Which brought back confusing feelings I had for her when I was 14. That's when I went to Aunt Freya because--I--jus---everything I felt for Josie was so new. I'd never felt anything like that for another person--"

"Well sweetie was she's first crush?"

"I guess so, and I spent all of that year and the next distantly pining over her, until I got suspended and everything that happened to us--you"

"Oh I see--so you never actually got over your crush. I can see the complication. How do you feel about this Landon boy?"

"He made me feel normal when everything else doesn't. It feels natural around him, he makes me smile, makes me feel like I'm wanted, I dont feel so alone when he's around. There is just this certain safety I feel when I'm around him. But there are times I fear that he is constantly asking me to choose him over everybody in the most extreme situations and it's just a lot to take in all at once. It's this curse of loyalty and end all and die all from the family that feeds off that. I dont want to be constantly choosing either him or others. "

"And Josie?"

"As for Josie. The _"what if"_ is killing me, everyone in the family always has this love interest that is teetering from being the one that got away to the final love. The true Mikaelson way if I had to call it something and it kills me. We both collectively like each other but I cant explain how I feel about Josie. I just know--when I'm around her I feel like I am who I'm suppose to be and it just make sense. There's this peace that dad always talked about and I feel it when she's around. How I feel about her runs so deep that I dont even know how to explain it. She just deserves someone who will fight for her, but I want her to be able to fight for herself too. She gets so wrapped in her sisters drama that she'll put her own happiness past her and I fear that she might do the same with how we feel for each other." Hope confesses and it doesn't really sort her feelings out if anything it just confuses her even more. 

"Wow, I see, it really is complicated. When I said have an epic love I should've specified that you shouldn't follow after your families epic loves which often came with multiple complications."

"Love is--"

"Not easy, but love comes in different forms"

"What is that suppose to mean?"

"There is love type of love that is just for your family-"

"Always and forever."

"Right and theres love that is for your friends, and the kind that romantically runs through you without an explanation. You constantly just want the best for this person whether that may be with or without you. Now what kind of love do you feel for Josie and Landon?" Hope gets up and starts to pace

"I dont know, aren't you suppose to be able to help me figure that out. I mean you were suppose to help think and clear up my feelings and you've done nothing but--Josie" she turns around to find her mother gone 

"Hey. You look like you've seen a ghost"

"I--uh--you could say that." 

"So why am I here? You seem tense?" 

"Yeah. Um...right."

"Seems like we've got something to talk about?"

"Yeah we do, I have feelings for you, and half of the time I have a tendency to ignore it because I've gotten use to ignoring it. So much so that I had completely forgotten about my crush back when I was 14, until you said you had a crush on me. When you said that, I felt relieved and excited. If anything I felt like a part me just loosened up. But there in lies the problem, its not that I'm not sure you have feelings for me its more like I dont want to hurt you. I dont want you to think that you are a choice."

"A choice. _'I dont want you to think that you are a choice._ '"

"I didn't mean for it to come out like that. It's just I know that at the end of the day Landon is going to find out, we're going to finally have a talk on what to do--"

"So what are you going to do Hope?"

"I dont know"

"A part of you does."

"I just I'm overwhelmed right now."

"You're overwhelmed Hope, that's how I feel all the time. Why do you think I put everyone else's emotions before my own. Think about it, te first time I do it, I fall in love with Satan and the next time I do, we can barely get a minute together to talk it out."

"That's not my fault--"

"Or maybe a part of you doesn't want to admit what it is you're actually feeling for both Landon and I. A part of you would rather you stay in confusion because that means you won't lose either of us. You'd rather we keep waiting for you so you dont have to decide and we won't leave you just like everybody else has." 

"Woah." Hope picks up the prism and walks back inside to return the prism but instead she is greeted by a distraught Lizzie. 

"Hey, are you okay?" 

"Stay back. It's fine, it'll pass. Just..."

"What do we do? Do we need to the yelling-in-the-woods thing?"

"No, I just, I need to find out what this merge thing is, okay? I feel like its a spell that she's gonna use to just leave or break us up or something!" Lizzie continues to panic, Hope places her hands on the girls shoulders "All right, deep breaths. Deep breaths. I'll call my Aunt Freya--she'll know something about the merge. Okay?"

"Okay" Lizzie calms down and agrees, Hope dashes out of the room and heads to find Josie. Having stalked her for a couple of months Hope's a got a few ideas as to where she might find Josie. Luckily enough she found her in the first place she'd expect the brunette to be reading the book that Lizzie got from Hope. Hope tries to forget the fake Josie and her conversation to calm herself down, she wouldn't want to come in too hot. 

"Hey."

"Shouldn't you be hanging out with your new best friend?" 

"Oh, that's actually why I'm here. I-i think some sort of crash is brewing."

"Then you should stay away."

"Um, look, I know that you're mad at her, but...she's still your sister, and she really needs your help."

"Why? She did this to herself."

"What? She can't control her brain chemistry."

"She can choose to take her medication. She hasn't taken it since we saw our mom because she doesn't like the way that it makes her feel. So she tried magical bracelets and releasing her inner bitch and then distracting herself with Miss Mystic Falls, but all of that is just delaying the inevitable. Letting her crash is the only way anything will ever change" Josie knows its harsh but she hasn't come down from her fight with Lizzie where she flew across the room. Josie hated how good it felt to actually take induce Lizzie crash but that to her is what she needed the most 

"And now she's got you doing her bidding for her, funny how you've got time to talk to Lizzie but can barely hold a conversation with me."

Hope is speechless, and decides to just get up and get out. Maybe it's time to figure out her feelings for Landon. 

\---

Hope turns around like she did before with her mother and Josie, to find Landon. She's overpowered by happiness "Hey there"

"Hey,"

"Are you okay?" 

"Yeah. Yeah sorry, um...the magical hologram thing still gets me"

"Hologram?" What do you mean, a hologram? What does that mean? That I'm not real? What are you talking about?" Landon jokes 

"Oh, my god, don't do that."

"Sorry."

"Yeah."

"You just seemed tense. I was trying to break the ice."

"You are the second person to tell me that today. At least I know this is a very accurate version of you. "

"You can thank yourself for that, I guess. You had something you wanted to say to me?" 

"Yeah. Um...I should have told you about your mom and -and the whole thing earlier. I mean, I was just trying to protect you from being hurt. So I just wanted to say that I'm sorry if I hurt you."

"What, that's it? You're _sorry if I hurt you_?"

"I am."

"Okay, then I accept your apology if you're actually sorry."

"What's is everyones problem?"

"I mean, do you seriously think that speech would have worked on me? I mean, come on, that's not what you actually wanted to say."

"How would you know?"

"Because I am you, remember?"

"Fine. Then you tell me what it is that I want to say, and I'll say it."

"That's not how this works, Hope. You have to listen"

"Listen to what?" Hope screams and Landon disappears. What is up with everyone today. 

"Even fake you is infuriating. God!" Hope paces around the dock for a good five minutes before Landon appears again 

"Hey, Hope. What's going on?"

"Don't pretend like you dont remember our last conversation."

"I just figured you'd want a fresh start"

"Oh. Guess even my subconscious can get stuff wrong."

"Touché. So, did you figure out what you wanted to say yet?"

"Uh, yeah, actually, I did. And what I wanted to say is this: I have been protecting you and putting your safety first ever since you got here. So what was I suppose to do with this secret? Hmm? Just stop protecting you? I know exactly what is feels like to be an orphan, okay? I was saving you from that. So you can be mad at me, but I was doing it because I care about you."

"No, you were doing it because you didn't want me to leave. Because you fear being abandoned, like how your mom left and your dad left--its why you run."

"This has nothing to do with my parents or anybody else."

"Then why did you start crying when you wore a dress your dad picked out?"

"Whoa. We're done"

"Hope, you're not listening" Hope once again picks up the prism and this time she decides to just leave it in her room. If one more person mentions her traumatic ass past, she might just blow. After putting the prism in her room she decides to just go to the rest of her classes it some dinner and figure out where the real Landon is. No twin drama just classes and typical search and rescue missions. 

\---

Alaric walks into his office to find Hope, "I need to talk to you about Raf."

"I have to say something first. Freya just explained the merge. Josie's pretty much figured it out, and, uh, Lizzie is spiraling. So either you do it or I will, but it's time to tell them the truth." Alaric feels trapped knowing that Hope is right, they only have so much time together before they turn 22. Maybe they can help Caroline look for a loophole or something. 

"Alright, you're right. I'm going to go do it now when I come back we have to talk about Raf."

"Fine, I'll be out by the docks." After cooling off for the rest of the day, Hope decides to use the prism one more time. She turns to find Landon, "What I said before about wanting to protect you, that was true. But...I also didn't want you to go. And, yeah, you know what, I hate it when people leave. I hate it. I thought I was over losing my parents, but I dont know after the last coupe of days and-and after seeing you lying there in the woods, thinking that you were dead...every time I lose someone, this, uh, voice in my head, it tells me, _It's your fault_ that I shouldn't even technically exist. That I'm a cosmic mistake. Oh, I dont know. I guess I just wanted someone to think that I'm worth staying for. I'm sorry for lying to you, Landon. I wanted you to stay because I care about you to the point that I might--" 

"You might love him." Josie appears cutting Hope off and frankly scaring the shit out of her

"Josie I--No, that-"

"No you dont love him? because I'm pretty sure you were just about to tell him you do. And that's okay Hope."

"Okay? Its the opposite of that. What about my feelings for you because god knows they are there. I tried Josie, I tried to keep it down after what you said. Maybe that's why I'm so quick to dismiss our talks or go on a rescue mission because my feelings for you are there. I just have no idea what to do with them. Do you have any idea how you make me feel--"

"No, I dont. The whole point of you doing this and talking to me is so you can figure out a way to tell the real me. So tell me."

"I can't put into words how I feel. All I know is this every time and any time I pushed you away you never fully gave up on me. You'd respect my space but linger close enough that when I did need someone you were there. Somehow, someway I always find my way back to you. I’d do anything for you Josie, and that scares me. My family loved that way and half of those that they loved are dead .” 


End file.
